I Will Be Bored To Death If I Marry This Woman

If I marry the mother of my child, I will be embracing a very dull life. When I say dull, I am not even using the word loosely. The only thing we talk about is home issues and occasionally, some family matters. Most of the time I end up spending time on my phone just to keep myself occupied. That’s not how I want to spend the rest of my life.

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She knows how I feel about the lack of depth in our conversations. I have spoken to her several times about it. I have encouraged her by constantly buying her internet data.

“Go online. Keep up with the times. Even if the news is too boring for you to follow, watch social media content so that we can have something to talk about.”

She tells me she will do it but she never does. Every time I come from work, the only thing we discuss is our nineteen-month-old child, what needs to be fixed or restocked in the home and matters of that nature.

Honestly, I kept hoping she would change until I found out last week that she is pregnant again. She is a good woman. I have never had to worry about the kind of mother she is. I know she is an amazing mother to our child. That’s why I decided to start our marriage process when I found out about the second pregnancy. Our families are already involved and we live together, so it’s just a matter of buying everything on the marriage list and picking a date.

Ever since I took the step for us to make things official, I have been asking myself if I am ready to leave such a life. One where I can’t have intellectual and engaging conversations with my wife. Will I be content with coming home to ask about the kids and discussing family matters, and then spend time on my phone to cure boredom?

I found that answer when I thought about a lady I met during field work. She is very knowledgeable, well-informed. She tickles my mind. I have never felt bored talking to her.

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We have meaningful things. You know: current affairs, investments, and business plans. The more I talk to her, the more she touches a piece of my heart. She fills the conversational and intellectual gap I lack at home.

I am not saying I want to marry instead of my baby mama. It’s just that I have been thinking and reevaluating my life. I know you can’t have it all in one person but what’s so difficult about going online to get updated on what’s going on with the world? Why can’t my woman do just that for me so that I can have something to talk to her about?

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This is what is pushing me to think of the new woman I met as a potential love interest. I know how it sounds. Even my heart tells me it would be wrong to leave the mother of my child because I am bored with our conversations. Especially, when I have lived with her long enough to know that she is a good woman.

I also can’t shake off my fear of living a life that feels boring and unfulfilling in terms of companionship. Marriage is a long journey. I don’t want to make a choice that will rob me of happiness. What do you think I should do?

—Jojoe
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